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Showing posts with label argument. Show all posts
Showing posts with label argument. Show all posts

Sunday, January 22, 2017

The Reason We Fight

Several months ago, I met some church friends of my parents who had come to the hospital where my mom was having tests run. As they had heard various stories involving myself and my sisters, who were also at the hospital, they asked questions in order to understand which one of us went with various stories. Apparently, I said something that hit home because the man said, "So you're the conspiracy theorist." I laughed and confessed that was me.

The irony is, my parents would never have described me to anyone as a conspiracy theorist (even though they know I am one). Until that moment, I had no idea the people from the church community I grew up in called me that behind my back. It does not come as a big surprise (nor does it upset me). I have had quite a few of them unfriend me on Facebook because they cannot stomach much of what I post on my page (which is oddly tame compared to the stuff I research). There are probably many more who have unfollowed my page in order to keep themselves sane. It goes with the territory when you make the decision to be as transparent in your beliefs as possible. I have never had problems standing up for what I believe in, even when it means standing alone.

It dawns on me now that the political divide we are feeling in the United States of America and the rest of the world is really not about differences in political philosophy as much as it about resolving the cognitive dissonance this election has brought up within ourselves. Face it. The world is changing in BIG ways. Change is difficult for most of us in the best of times. When the whole world is in upheaval at the same time, it is going to bring up some pretty big garbage that needs to be sorted through and dealt with.

Cognitive dissonance occurs when our rational minds are confronted with information our hearts tell us is true but are not quite ready to deal with in a rational way. We will run from it, go into denial, argue, and even fight in order to get away from this growing awareness. The thing is, cognitive dissonance will not go away, even if you change who you hang out with or your physical location. Truth will seek you out (and sometimes hunt you down) until you choose to look at it.

How do you know you are in a state of cognitive dissonance? You know because certain topics set you on edge (or sometimes on fire). You feel compelled to argue and justify why you believe as you do. As you go deeper into the process, you find your "rational" arguments begin to lose their power but you argue on. Sometimes you go so far as dismiss arguments altogether, justifying your beliefs solely on the thought the other side is "stupid" or "ignorant" and just hasn't thought it through.

My interactions on social media lately have been interesting. When I post anything that could be interpreted as positive toward Trump, I am immediately labeled an ignorant, conservative Trump supporter and told why my approval is baseless. When I post my approval of the Women's March that swept DC and many areas of the country, I am told it was all funded by George Soros and is just a way to keep Trump demonized in the minds of the people. (I do need to confess I enjoy playing the devil's advocate. I don't expect people will agree with me, but I do want people to assess why they believe as they do.) 

My own personal areas of cognitive dissonance involve my own ego when it comes to dealing with personal attacks. I am learning to deal with attacks in positive ways, attempting to bend and adapt in ways that do not break me or my composure. I have a long way to go before I get to that place of inner peace. I'm sure more garbage will naturally appear once this one is dealt with in full. I, too, am a work-in-progress.

The next time someone or something makes you angry enough to argue or fight, take a moment to ask yourself why. It may just be that your heart is bringing awareness to your mind so you have the capacity to face it, deal with it, and heal it. Our whole world begins to heal when we deal with the cognitive dissonance within ourselves.

~CSE

  



Saturday, October 10, 2015

The Problem With Arguments

I'll admit it. I have a few soapbox issues that will still make me want to argue with other well meaning people. I'm better at recognizing them now than I was in the past, but I am still a work-in-progress. The thing is, arguments do not take us to a good place. They take us to a distracting place, and that is the whole problem.

Look at the debate on gun control. On one side of the debate you have people who do not like guns. They don't like the fact guns can be deadly. They don't like the perceived pain guns can cause. These people wish guns did not exist.

On the other side are the people who own guns (or at least believe people should have the right to own them). These people will use the guns to protect themselves. Sometimes they use them to hunt or just the thrill of shooting a target at the shooting range. One thing they don't do is go around shooting other people. Yes, every once in a while there is a tragic accident or someone becomes enraged and acts before thinking, but the VAST majority of gun owners go their whole lives without incident.

While I can see both sides of the argument, I also see this: arguing about the right to own guns gets nobody anywhere. All it does is serve to piss people off so they don't cooperate in other ways. The other sad truth is, neither argument addresses the real issues!

Instead of arguing, we should be asking questions! For example, why did the most recent shooting take place on an Oregon college campus? Was the shooter mentally ill? Was he on drugs? Was he angry? The point is, mental illness, drug use and anger management are the issues that need to be addressed!!! Giving someone a gun or taking one away is not the point!!! You can kill someone with a knife or a car or a baseball bat just as easily as you can kill someone with a gun!!!

When we wrap ourselves in arguments over things like guns or religion or politics or marriage, we unwittingly wrap ourselves up in the problems instead of the solutions! Arguments serve no useful purpose at all, unless you are one of the world's power brokers. The people in power are invested in our arguments because arguments distract us from our true callings. This is why the media (which they own and control) brings these arguments to us in every way imaginable--even through our entertainment!

Arguments do not allow us to fix the world. Want to create a new and improved world? Stop arguing and focus on solutions!!! It's that simple.

~CSE