Peace In the Chaos

The past year has been a very crazy and difficult one for me. This last month has been particularly chaotic as my family welcomed a new grandson into the world and I struggled to juggle several trips to south Georgia along with work and trying to take care of my husband's ever growing needs. Two days ago I was at the point of utter exhaustion and total mental meltdown as I attempted to get last minute prep done for my family's Christmas. I finally had to throw in the towel yesterday and allow myself to be content with what I had already gotten done.

Allowing myself to be content with my less-than-perfect self is tough. I am my own worst critic. Coupled with the fact that I enjoy making happy holiday memories for my family, my bright plans not all coming to fruition is a bit of a letdown.

That said, in the midst of the self-created chaos I've had some truly wonderful insights. The first (and most important): I am being way too hard on myself. I have created a must-have scenario that is unrealistic and unfair--especially considering the circumstances of my present life. I am losing the most important part of myself trying to bring about the "perfect" holiday.

I am also aware that I am doing too much for my adult children. When they were little, it was important to me that Christmas be exciting and fun. I so enjoyed planning, buying their Santa gifts, and trying to make sure they had happy childhood memories, regardless of the fact they lived in a one parent household. (Yes, I was overcompensating in many ways.) That said, Christmas was always my favorite holiday and I wanted my kids to share this with me. I believe I have been successful in that goal. The thing is, now that they are adults I need to pull my own reins in and allow them to create their own memories. I will still work to make sure I celebrate the holidays with them. I now understand I need to create new holiday goals--something more realistic and maybe something that includes more of the public at large like volunteering with a program that distributes toys to needy children.

Nearly having a nervous breakdown can sharpen your focus. As I sit in the quiet drinking my morning coffee, I understand that everything is all right in the world. I have shelter, clothing, food, a loving family that I will get to spend time with, and new opportunities opening up. There can be peace within the chaos. We just have to take the time to remember it.

The Entities We Carry Around

Did you know you are probably carrying around parasites as you sit and read this? I'm not talking about the normal bacteria or "worms" we think about when the term parasite comes up (although I'm beginning to wonder about their possible connection to the topic at hand). I'm talking about the type described in the Bible where Jesus casts out demons and heals people. While I don't believe the entities we carry around are likely to make us go insane (and totally out of control), I do believe they give us problems we don't need to deal with.

I know people who have been cleansed of such things within religious settings. A friend of mine once described going to a Christian church service where the minister literally began "pulling" at the air around his head and he felt things coming out of him! A good friend of mine grew up in Thailand, and she remembers her stepfather, a local medicine man, being asked to pull demons out of people in the village, which often produced interesting and amazing results.

I myself attended some in depth Access Consciousness classes a few years back and went through a process to identify and pull out such entities in order to "get clear". It was an intriguing process, although I have to confess some of them have probably entered back in. When you are used to the voices in your head, being clear of them can sometimes feel lonesome and empty.

The thing is, these entities are not you. They can distract you, annoy you, make you feel worthless, depress you and even destroy you if you allow them space. They do not have your best interests at heart. They are using you to survive.

Why do I share this now? They can keep you occupied enough it is difficult to connect to the divine. Some of the more powerful entities have this as a goal because they understand that true connection would put them in danger of being kicked out.

One thing we can all do to keep from carrying around more of these entities, is to take care of ourselves. Many of the things we do to keep us physically healthy also protect our spiritual selves. Drinking water (filtered and pure if you can access it) helps. Eating quality foods also helps. Staying away from cigarettes, drugs (both illegal and prescribed), and even sex with a heavily infested person will help keep you safer. Such activities can open holes in your spiritual aura, and that is where entities get through.

Also be aware that if you carry around powerful entities they will often encourage more of those behaviors that weaken your system. For example, if you have had drug problems in the past and are trying to get sober, these entities will try to pull you back into the drug in order to keep you from expelling them. Ask the divine for help. You have angels who are tasked with helping and protecting you. They will bring answers to you and guide you if you ask for it.

We are all fighting inner battles of one sort or another. Know that some of these battles are not just you fighting yourself. Inner healing can come. You just need to understand the source of the problem and take measures to correct it.

Know that I love you and will help if I can!

~CSE